Action Stations 2 – dream advice

Back to Barbara Sher‘s philosophy (think I will forget Picasso. I have digressed too far).

boo

boo

So, if we figure out what we were put on this planet to do, what we would feel unfulfilled in life on some level if we didn’t do. Would we rush to do it?

Hell no, probably not! Our resistance rises up and stops us. It would make us anxious doing that thing we want to do, so some part of our brain says don’t do it, be safe, stay here on the sofa and eat and watch TV instead. And I do!

Do you have anything inside you, which you often ponder on and even sometimes declare you will do, but don’t even get started? For me I would like to write a book (fact or fiction) on relationships and love, or paint paintings, or create videos or an online magazine, or be the next Oprah or be a career/life coach and help people like Barbara does, or be the person that escorts VIPs onto their private jets and yachts, making brilliant conversation in 4 languages (when I’ve fully mastered them) and making them laugh along the way (most odd I know, why am I sharing my weirdest secrets here?), or write hit songs in the style of Christina Aguilera for my singing daughter Katrina Capell, or in the style of Adele for my singing daughter Lucia Capell, or be a public speaker on some subject or other (yup, got over my fear of public speaking luckily) or, or, or….. Do you see my problem? A true Scanner (jack of all trades, interested in far too many things to settle on just one).

But less about me. Have you ever brainstormed like that? Perhaps if you did it every day for a week and exercised that muscle, you might find further dreams hidden in the recesses of your wishing brain. And just maybe if you found/created a large enough group of people, they could help you achieve one of your dreams and remind you to keep going until you got there even if you had to back off for a couple of months in the middle of your journey and be mentors to each other.

And who knows how you’d feel if you achieved a dream? You might hate it. Am I afraid of success? You bet. Why would anyone pay me large sums of money to do anything which I find easy and surely anyone else could do? I would feel almost guilty. Well I plan to overcome all of that and just bloody do it! Forgive my potty mouth. It seems appropriate.  If it brings in money which I can accept, great.  If not, at least I will feel fulfilled.

Wow this was a bit open, even for me. If you don’t laugh at some of my dreams, above, I won’t laugh at yours. Apparently you should never share them with friends and family, only to strangers and preferably strangers who have already praised you and you feel comfortable sharing with. So I hereby say that you are all awesome people for being bloggers, being open enough and motivated enough to want to give you time free of charge to other bloggers by sharing your wisdom and thought with us. You are all even more wonderful for reading my blog at all and reading this far today.

Do you dare to reveal any dreams here in the comments? They don’t have to be something necessarily achievable, in case you hadn’t noticed :)!

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Action Stations!

Action is the foundational key to all success – Pablo Picasso

now clock

The best time to take action

Pablo Picasso – he brings up such images that he must be an exciting fellow, right? This quote seems so obvious and boring but because it’s him, I will use it. Plus of course it means something to me today. Blogging has made me more aware of many things – which is always a good thing. One of those is my moods over time. Weeks where I am subdued (for me anyway, just call me Tigger!) and weeks where I am the most energetic person on the planet. As I prefer that last one and consider it a form of success, I have decided to ‘fake it until I make it’. By being that person of action, even though I don’t feel like it, hopefully I will find my next ‘thing’ which grabs my attention and I will be off. I read recently that to be happy, you need a project and a community. You are my community (you’re low maintenance, guys, thanks!) so now I am on to projects.

I am soon going to be taking some major ‘action’. I am gathering my holiday leave and some serious savings to go and spend 5 days at a retreat in France (from here in Sydney) with the great and wonderful Barbara Sher (please look her up). She is a no bullshit, hilarious lady who will help you find ‘success’ (achieve the essence of your dreams), even when “you have no goals, no character and are often in a lousy mood”. Barbara is an arch enemy of magic thinking, positive thinking and chanting slogans.

She says she sees people like ‘gardens’, each one a genius in their own right because we are all unique and have our own way of seeing and doing things which nobody else on the planet can do. We deserve it to the rest of the planet to spend time doing what we love so that we can develop those innate skills and share them with the world. Take action!

So I am hoping she will see through me and sort out this grab bag of a person! It is thanks to her already that I am blogging, meeting you people and realising that it’s OK to be a Scanner; a jack of all trades and master of none. She calls us Ideas Factories, I guess as we can link our different interests together to come up with ideas in the real world. Where do you find a suitable career for one of those?? Diva-ish art director at an Ad Agency? Entrepreneur or inventor? I may not necessarily find a new career but will hopefully find a group of people who will be lifelong friends (10 people only on this retreat) and hold each other accountable for following up on making things happen.

Anyway, back to the quote. Who doesn’t have things, ideas, must do’s in their heads? And how often do we take action on them? Or on what percentage of them? This is where Barbara comes in. She has also been called the Resistance Whisperer. She knows full well how you get on a high with an idea, think you’re brilliant and then crash and think you’re stupid. She talks about the third phase, which is where you get back to normal and go find all the detailed notes you hopefully made while on your high and pick them up again. She says it’s a ‘sin’ not to share your gifts and take action on them. Do what you love, even if only for 5 minutes a day. Isolation is the dream killer so have someone else hold you accountable to do what you love.

To be continued…..

 

Criticise at your peril

Don't ever run out in the road again!

Don’t ever run out in the road again!

This little post is a reblog in a way of someone else’s words. Or perhaps it’s just a very long quote from a Master!

Yesterday I watched a Barbara Sher video on YouTube where she says to be very careful of giving criticism. “One piece of criticism is not overcome by 20 forms of praise. First of all you might not know what you are talking about and secondly even if later down the track it turns out that you are right, they won’t remember what you said. They will remember the hurt.” Wise words indeed from one of my favourite people (more on her later, but I am spending over two months pay soon to go and meet her!!).

The bit that spoke loudest is that ‘maybe you won’t know what you are talking about’. There have certainly been times that I have gotten the wrong end of the stick and have maybe put in my two cents worth to an organisation and then been politely responded to in way which showed I had it all wrong. Ouch! but no biggie – I can do failure and sorry really well. A heartfelt apology and we are all on our way. I don’t hang on to my failures too long – too scatty to remember them, luckily. And of course sometimes ‘you have to learn to accept the apology you never got’. I like that one too. Got a few of those under my belt, sadly.

What about the times when you don’t criticise or give feedback, don’t speak up for yourself? Is it because you know you are speaking to someone unable to hear you or because you fear the venom that will pour out of you once you let loose? Nobody wants venom inside. That leads to cancer, right? So should you speak?

And again, if that venom is somehow misdirected, you will only end up feeling bad, especially if you hurt the other person and have any kind of compassion in you. Time to consider what you say before you open up. In some cases I choose not to ‘stand up for’ myself, no matter how much I am invited to. And in others I speak where clearly it is not wanted. But that is tomorrow’s post….

How to know the difference?

This quote I just found on Pinterest sure helps!

He has the right to criticize, who has a heart to help.